Lately, I’ve found myself in a state of near-constant feelings of butting my head against a proverbial wall, smushed up against a glass ceiling. Not in my job or relationship, mind you, but just the endless stream of universal passive and active hatred directed at women. Everything feels really bleak sometimes. I feel like I’m watching some sort of absurdist play, and that I don’t get the punchline.
I want to focus on this utter nonsense this month. Don’t worry, I’ve got a store of links about masculinities, sexual minorities, and positive things saved up for you, but we need to talk about this.
So, remind me again why the virtue of my being born female* means my life is worth less that of a man? Look me in the goddamn eye and tell me I am less of a human being because I have a vagina.
Michigan State Rep Barred From Speaking After ‘Vagina’ Comments. NPR: The Two Way.
Speaking of vaginas, did you know that Rep. Lisa Brown said vagina in the Michigan State House and was silenced by Majority Floor Leader Jim Stamas? (Watch Rep. Brown’s statement in the video on the link.) As if this were not bad enough, Rep. Barb Byrum was also not allowed to speak after she tried to “introduce an amendment to the abortion regulations bill banning men from getting a vasectomy unless the sterilization procedure was necessary to save a man’s life.” Reps. Byrum and Brown, you are my heroes. Stick it to the man!
Choice quote:
She defended her use of the word “vagina,” saying it is the “anatomically medically correct term.”
“If they are going to legislate my anatomy, I see no reason why I cannot mention it,” she said according to the Free Press.
“A Woman’s Worst Nightmare,” by Mary Dickson, PBS.org.
This piece is from 1996, and yet, it has not aged at all–embarrassingly so. Dickson writes about the fear of being assaulted with which women live and how men do now understand what this perceived and real constant threat feels like. (Perhaps that part has changed, though. My close male friends are pretty understanding, but these are men who have a good grasp on gender issues.) Think I’m joking? There’s a reason why my Taekwondo instructors sent me off to college with counter-assault lessons and a keychain that doubled as a weapon. There’s a reason why I get really nervous walking past groups of men on the street. There’s a reason why SafeRide on campuses exist.
Choice quote:
A woman’s worst nightmare? That’s pretty easy. Novelist Margaret Atwood writes that when she asked a male friend why men feel threatened by women, he answered, “They are afraid women will laugh at them.” When she asked a group of women why they feel threatened by men, they said, “We’re afraid of being killed.”
“Today I had to leave class to cry,” Jamie Keiles, Teenagerie
The spiritual companion piece to Dickson’s, Keiles discusses the problems of “rape prevention” in American culture.
Choice quote: “We can’t end rape by dressing modestly or avoiding dark alleys or letting friends babysit our drinks when we go to the bathroom. The only way to abolish rape is for nobody to rape anyone else. It really isn’t a difficult concept.”
“Dear The Internet, This Is Why You Can’t Have Anything Nice” by Helen Lewis, New Statesman
Anita Sarkeesian of Feminist Frequency started a Kickstarter to raise money for the Tropes vs Women in Video Games project. Her Youtube account was slammed with horrifyingly sexist comments and threats to her person; her Wikipedia page was changed to pornography. What sort of ridiculous world am I living in that a woman wanting to analyze media depictions of genders gets rape threats? You can literally check off EVERY box in Sexism in Games Bingo, with the added bonus of slurs against Jewish people and lesbians, too!
You can help stop this. Call this bullshit out where you see it. I don’t mean feed the YouTube trolls (never), but if your friends or coworkers make sexist comments, call them out on it. If you find a cause you love that supports gender equality, support it. Teach young people that sexual, physical, and emotional violence against anyone is unacceptable. Go to a Slut Walk or a Pride Parade. Write and get your voices out there. Our silence–our unwillingness to stick up for ourselves–is a killer. Don’t sit there wringing your hands and saying “That’s just how the world is!” STAND UP. FIGHT BACK.
Note
*Cisgendered for me, but I want to be inclusive of all who identify as female, whether you are a target of this medical sexist legislature or not.
Dear Leah,
If you haven’t read the Guardian articles on ‘Vaginagate’, please do. The British are thought rather prudish by continental Europeans, which is, perhaps, why they write so sarcastically about American prudishness. They no longer have their empire but still like laughing at the colonials. (Of course, there’s a lot to laugh at.)
Please click on http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jun/15/vagina-monologue-michigan-gop-lawmakers?intcmp=239 to read an article by the Michigan state legislator who was banned from speaking for saying ‘vagina’.
The ‘Vaginagate’ article at http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/jun/15/michigan-politician-banned-using-word-vagina?intcmp=239 is also worth reading.
But my favorite is the article by a Naomi McAuliffe at http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jun/15/vaginas-arent-dirty-even-in-michigan?intcmp=239 . She knows vaginas insideout, as it were, and isn’t afraid of saying so. She lists a variety of vagina euphemisms. I especially like ‘fun tunnel’. I hadn’t heard that one before.
Naomi even has a blog with ‘vagina’ in its name, though she writes of more than just that part of a woman’s anatomy in her blog posts. (Please click on http://www.vaginadentatablog.net/ to go to Naomi’s blog.)
Take care.
Yours truly,
James Wiegert
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Hi, James! Thanks for all the links on Vagina-gate–all great reads and interesting to see how similarly The Guardian and NPR handled the story. The euphemism one is pretty interesting–how many (and how ridiculous) terms we’ve come up with is pretty interesting (and some of them are quite scary). Which reminds me of some of the posts Smart Bitches, Trashy Books (intelligent women who read and review –and enjoy!–romance novels) do on purple prose and silly names for body parts: http://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/blog/a_polemic_on_purple_prose
Thanks for reading!
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I love your posts. Plz plz keep them coming, eh?
I was really impressed by one incidence in the work place I experienced sometime late last year. The teachers and I were having our meeting for the next English class (that’s me plus 2 of the sensei – one female and younger, one male and a bit older). A third teacher came up a started making casual comments about the female teacher’s track pants and that we enjoyed reading what was written on the hindside. The female sensei was obviously put off by this and the male sensei totally stepped in and told the third teacher – quitely, strongly – to step off. I was impressed by his no-jokes, straight-faced ‘No’ and standing up for his coworker.
‘“They are afraid women will laugh at them.” When she asked a group of women why they feel threatened by men, they said, “We’re afraid of being killed.”’
A quote that drives home.
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But of course, and thank you!
I’m really glad that teacher told the creeper teacher to shut the hell up. I’m no fan of white knights, but when someone can say “You’re wrong and you’re being sexist [or homophobia or racist, etc.]. Go away, I’m embarrassed for you,” that is very powerful. Good on him!
The more I think about it, the more that quote is true–which disturbs me even more the more I think about it.
Thanks for reading and commenting!
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No sweat~ ^_^
Actually, I was thinking of asking you for some help (no obligations!)~~
I’ve had an idea for a webcomic on gender issues and sexuality (and religion, philosophy…big questions), and have been looking for a good way to kick it off. If you or anyone else is interested in collaboration or knows a good site for hosting webcomics (or a method of posting webcomics), leave a message on my blog.
Plz thx! 🙂
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I read a lot of webcomics–I know some artists use Keenspot, some use WordPress, some are independently hosted and don’t have information. I’m no expert, though.
Very curious about this idea and to see what you come up with!
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Thanks, Leah! I’ll check out Keenspot and letcha know if I get anything up. ^_^v
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I’ll second Angry. Only found this blog a few weeks back, and my only complaint is that there’s not more of it. Keep it coming.
That said, I’ve not been through all the back catalogue, so forgive me if you’ve been through this before, but what are your thoughts on the whole Slutwalk phenomenon? It’s always struck me a a touch confused. Or at least the message it’s putting out is easily interpreted as confused. Wear what you want, of course. Wear it without fear of rape or assault, absolutely. Reclaim the word ‘slut’ because women are just as entitled to sleep around as men, yes. Dressing like a ‘slut’ is good because if you sleep around through choice then it doesn’t mean you’re fair game for rape, totally. And so it continues…
There’s a lot going on there. I was involved through work in a couple of Reclaim the Night marches back in London, and that seemed to have a pretty clear, unambiguous message. I’m no PR expert, but clarity of message is always praised as a virtue. Every person I’ve talked to about this (admittedly not many), has said something like ‘Listen, it’s very simple, slutwalks are xxx’. And that xxx is always different. Of course, they could all be right, and I’d like to think I’m not really the target audience. But who is? And what are they meant to take away from it?
The message is fine, but I’m not sure it’s the best method of delivery. As I said, I’d be interested in your thoughts.
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Aw, thank you! That’s very kind of you.
I haven’t addressed Slutwalk before. It became a thing after I left the US, so I have no firsthand experience. In the US, we have had Take Back the Night (the root of Reclaim the Night), which began in the US around 1975 (http://www.takebackthenight.org/history.html). I personally associate it with childhood memories of the twilight years of Second Wave feminism in the 1980s. It was about fighting back physically, raising awareness, and was” a visible way to take a stand against sexual violence, specifically violence against women.”
I think it raised awareness for women to be careful and learn how to defend themselves as well as awareness of the level of violence against women. But, at its core, it is rape prevention. TBTN did not focus on preventing rape by not raping. The movement is also within the system, employing institutions (police, etc.) to help.
SlutWalk, on the other hand, seems to be born of the Third Wave, the realization that our institutions are sexist and misogynistic. The key tenet seems to be that no one deserves to be raped, no matter if she is coming home from the library or from a nightclub. From the Toronto SlutWalk page,
“As the city’s major protective service, the Toronto Police have perpetuated the myth and stereotype of ‘the slut’, and in doing so have failed us. With sexual assault already a significantly under-reported crime, survivors have now been given even less of a reason to go to the Police, for fear that they could be blamed. Being assaulted isn’t about what you wear; it’s not even about sex; but using a pejorative term to rationalize inexcusable behaviour creates an environment in which it’s okay to blame the victim.” (http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/about/why)
So, instead of focusing on defense and awareness of crimes of sexual violence, the SlutWalkers want to call out our Madonna/Whore complex and protect ALL women and men, regardless of gender, sexual preference, fashion sense, or sex life. Anyone who is sexually assaulted ought to have the full support of the police and community behind her or him. More info: http://www.slutwalkchicago.org/about.html
So, that’s my understanding of the two events, despite having been too young for TBTN and not in the country for SlutWalk. Both of them have merits, and, as you pointed out, faults. But I think SlutWalk represents a new way of conceptualizing the way our society treats women in general and sexual assault victims, and that’s something I can get behind.
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Thanks for the considered reply. I’m still not sure those ideas might not be better articulated in a different way, but given I can’t think of that way right now I’m probably not in a position to criticise too much.
And on the link Kathryn provided below, buried within it is another link to this glorious takedown of Game of Thrones – http://tigerbeatdown.com/2011/08/26/enter-ye-myne-mystic-world-of-gayng-raype-what-the-r-stands-for-in-george-r-r-martin/
I’m not on board with all of it, but the dissection of the female characters is a thing of vicious beauty. Well worth reading if you have any interest in that kind of thing.
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I wonder that, too. At any rate, I believe that mandatory gender training is the key to educating the polices, lawyers, medical workers, and other institutions that are meant to help people in situations of violence or assault.
That article you linked on GoT was amazing! Loved the writing style, though I haven’t read the books and have only seen 3 episodes of the show, so I don’t know if I can agree with the writer yet. I read it to my husband, who mostly agreed. I wonder if anyone has compiled a list of non-creepy works of speculative fiction? I would enter Yoshinaga’s Ōoku into that list wholeheartedly.
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I love your annotated link posts (as I love all of your posts, of course). As the other commenters have said, please keep them coming!
I have a link that I’d like to share, which I think is relevant to the theme of “being under attack from all sides.” Although my feelings about rape are pretty clear (How do you prevent rape? DON’T RAPE PEOPLE), I’m still trying to decide where I stand on the issue of “fantasy” rape, or rape within a fictional context. Because the issue is important to me, I really enjoyed this essay…
“Geek Media: What’s With All the Rape?”
http://gamingaswomen.com/posts/2012/05/geek-media-whats-with-all-the-rape/
…especially for the concrete examples it gives of how rape is treated in media such as fantasy novels and comic books, as well as the links to even more detailed descriptions and discussion. The comments on the essay, of course, are infuriating, but aren’t they always.
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Thank you! I’m glad you enjoy these posts. I honestly didn’t think so many people would get excited about my ranting about the news!
The blog you linked looks great–looking forward to reading it. The article is really thorough, and I think it explains the issue well. Rape and sexual assault are a serious problem in our culture and the culture we study and in the world. The media portrayal of assault is extremely problematic, and I can’t stand it when rape is used to create conflict or drive a plot forward. It’s a serious issue. Will definitely repost this!
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[…] the July Gender Reader, I posted about the horrifyingly sexist reaction to Anita Sarkeesian’s project Tropes vs Women […]
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